Crab people. Crab people. Look like Crab shitpost like people.

This is my cat. There are many like it but this one is mine. My cat is my best friend. It is my life.

Are you insane? A knife is useless against those massive claws!

No advice for you OP, I just try and ride it out. I try breathing as erratic as I can to get my wife to wake me but it never works.

I do have a question though : did you see the witch? Ive had all sorts of half-dreams but never met her yet, I’m kinda scared cause she appears in so many people’s accounts of sleep paralysis.

Not bring him in, just like “hes real impatient, hopefully we can work something out just us two, I dont want to deal with him either”

LinkedIn Park.

craaawwwwwling iiiiinnnnnnn my cuuuuuuuuuube

Petition to officially recognise “greater Birmingham area”

Its shitposts within shitposts

Using an offensive accent in real life too incase your device is listening and realises youre not in that country.

OH HERRO PREEZ I AM INTERNETTUH USERRR

In the UK my wife had an emergency c section, and they insisted I came into the operating room with her. By the time id got all ready with the scrubs and stuff, they’d already started when I got in there. After a minute or two, one of the doctors said i could take pictures. He looked confused/pitiful at me when I told him I didnt bring my phone in with me.

Of course I didnt bring my phone in, right? Theres beeping machines everywhere. If it can interfere with planes then of course im not going to risk it when my wife’s all open.

To be honest, once that starts happening I wont be worried about my digital library. I’ll be so pissed that ill just stop spending any money on any games ever again. I’ll be back to sailing the high seas.

I tried making that point on reddit. You wouldn’t believe the amount of down arrows that came at me.

Can you imagine how in sync you’d be with your clone for co-op games?

I keep trying Myst. First tried it when I was about 5 on my dad’s PC, some 30 years ago. Every few years I’ll give it another shot, spend a couple of hours before giving up. I like to think I’m good at puzzle games, and Myst has such legendary status that I refuse to look at a single hint. I will solve it off my own back. Its like a mini white whale.

My problem is I havent managed to solve a single puzzle yet. I cant even be sure ive identified where the first puzzle is.

Inscryption. I thought it was a poor man’s Slay The Spire using janky escape-room mechanics as a cheap, nifty gimmick to lend it some value.

It appeared on Game Pass, and upon trying it I sneered a little at it, as Spire and Monster Train were my only experiences with deckbuilders and I had been spoiled. I had no idea how good it really was. Gameplay mechanics it can’t match up, but it contains a story thats shot straight into my top 10 of all time.

It shares an exclusive room in my memory alongside Bioshock, Deus Ex, KOTOR and the like.

Unfortunately it can’t take me by surprise twice. The shock, suspense and mystery have been depleted and I cant feel it again. Ive been told the dev has more games that are all gold like that, but I cant look them up. I went into Doki Doki knowing that something happens and youll just have to find out and its spoilers and iykyk etc, and when it did it it just felt kinda neat but thoroughly underwhelming. I just need to hope that I stumble onto one of the devs other projects like a beautiful landmine in the future.

youCanCallMeDragon figured it out? Oh this is a new low…

You really Jezzed it

Thanks boss, youre out here doing the lord’s work

Probably. I used mobile and rely on autocorrect for my fat fat thumbs. It just does what it wants.

Half to Hitler