nah most people in my city think making 250K a year is ‘barely getting by’ like that other poster. our local subreddit would have posts claiming that a single person needed a minimum of 200K+ to be ‘comfortable’. I was ‘comfortable’ living here on 50K (savings, retirement, healthcare, going out regularly, etc)… and that was only 6 years ago. and tons of people who were making 500K a year screaming how unfair and impoverished they were because they couldn’t afford 40ft boats or seven figure homes on the water. and getting heavily upvoted.

by buy ‘barely getting by’ they usually mean a giant suburban house, two luxury cars, expensive vacations, and a second home. people seem to think anyone who isn’t a millionaire by 35 is a failure at life. a lot of the people I meet often make same/less than me buy spend WAY more than I do. Like 15K on traveling per year easily.

I grew up poor though. I didn’t grow up in a big rich suburban house w/ a vacation home… like many people who live here and feel poor.

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NYT used to be the paragon of USA journalism, but was always considered liberal paper.

I disagree on both fronts now though. NYT has really fallen in both professionalism and liberalism the past two decades, but so has a lot of the journalism industry.

going to disagree with most of your takes on the media/journos. that entire industry is mostly corrupt for the past 20 years because the barriers to entry are so high that you have to be part of the elite to become a journalist, hence why journalism has become increasingly irrelevant and seems completely out of touch to anyone who isn’t part of the elite. Also i feel like a lot of your political claims are way over simplified and exaggerated, but there is some truth to what you are saying. I stopped reading most ‘elite’ publications because they really started showing their detachment from any greater reality around the late 2000s, and it got far worse in the mid 2010s.

I spent a decade studying/working/teaching philosophy, history, and political theory. Hardly anyone knows anything about these things… and often when you see them on media… the takes are horrible ignorant/bad/wrong and vastly oversimplified. So are the takes by most consumers of philosophy the podcasts/books/etc about them. And it’s sad frustrating how people think they know everything there is to know about Plato’s views because they listened to a 45m podcast about The Cave or read one of his books once. And the people who do know about these things? totally ignored both mainstream media and the social media types… but their insights when they are given the time/effort to shine is truly wonderful and insightful.

I also taught coursework in these areas… most of my students were not dumb or idiots… but only 5% actually gave a shit about learning. Most just wanted to be entertained or validated in their delusions and pre-existing beliefs about the world, and they got very frustrated when the course didn’t do that for them. At least when I taught 15 years ago they were not prone to violence, threats, and intimidation, like they are now.

Now I work in tech…and it’s astounding how horrible ignorant most technological ‘smart’ people are… and how much of their ‘intelligence’ is just… a quasi religious belief set. I think because tech is ‘mysterious’ to the general population the ‘techies’ now considered themselves the high priests of society… saw this going on 20 years ago and now we are reading the point where the corruption, idiocy, and delusions of grandeur have really started to show. I’m not a huge expert in most tech… but the amount of sheer ignorance perpetuated by overconfident idiots in the tech sector is just… mind blowing… and most ‘techies’ i know legit seem to feel an innate sense of superiority to non tech workers and if you challenge them they throw temper tantrums like children.

where i live people think anything less than 500k/yr is not doing well.

So just never socialize with anyone?

I make about 135K but I’m 40. I feel wealthy. But my family/friends/girlfriends all think I’m living barely above poverty level and tell me that I am a ‘not doing well at life’ or claim ‘you lack any drive for success at life.’

It’s weird af.

autism threads on lemmy are full of autism supremacists. it’s insane.

Sad, but not surprising. I agree with social and disability payments but I am not naive enough to think they are often abused and exploited. Many people are getting assistance that should not, and many who desperately need it get none.

USA has lots of issues with our school systems with autistic children and parents who want to force them to be a part of the general school population when they should not be, and demand citys/towns give their children tons of extra resources that are already scarce, and they sue the districts which have no budgets/staff for this stuff…

Yeah. Massive difference between those who have mild autistic issues an those who are essential disabled from normal life by it.

Yet the former seem to think they are the ones who are ‘truly’ suffering.

you discriminate every goddamn day. what people say, how they look, what they wear. that’s fine.

it’s not fine for governments to do that unless you are a fan of totalatarianism.

they don’t have the attention span to watch a 90 minute movie.

what i dont’ get about socializing as a 30-40 something… is how ultra focused it is on money and politics… and almost nothing else. every convo is politics or money related. in money include jobs, houses, cars, and expensive consumer purchasing. or travel/vacations.

i literally haven’t talked about movies/shows/games/books with anyone in like a decade. if i try to bring that topic up people get weirded out and go right back to politics, money, or travel.

all my dates these days only care about my money and my politics too. nobody asks me what i like to do in my free time or what my favorite things are anymore. i saw a date between some younger 20 somethings and they were listing their fav shows/movies and talking about them and I was so incredibly jealous. last time I went on a date where someone asked me about that stuff was like 15 years ago.

i had a date this weekend and all she wanted to know was my politics, my job, my family/education background and what kind of car I drive. It was degrading.

yeah same. i do stuff. i see people. none of them are my friends.

i haven’t had a close regular friendship since my early 20s. mostly because back then we had lots of free time to do nothing but talk about our feelings and shit. once i graduated i no longer had that luxury in life. on the flip side, i was incredibly lonely/depressed most of HS/college sometimes to the point of suicidal thoughts… even though I had many close friends and was socially popular. once i graduated and started spending most of my time alone… i stopped being lonely.

all my old friendships ended because we became radically different people and no longer had any common interests or values. same thing with all my romantic relationships. i never found a partner who wanted to grow or change like I did, so we broke up.

once a month or three.

pen and paper

or pencil if you prefer

it just fucking works.

also, you won’t ever retain things you don’t use on a frequent basis. that’s just how memory works.

Everybody moves at a different speed, and if the speed isn’t working for you, take it as a sign. I have found that people who take their sweet time responding end up being a little selfish, because they don’t see you as a person who’s investing time to get to know them, all they see is when it’s convenient for them to reply.

I take my time because I have a busy life and I’m not on my phone most of the day. I reply when I’m ready to reply. I am not going to reply just because some stranger has anxiety/control issues with texting. and I’ve found people who get upset at your lack of timely replies (in terms of hours/minutes) always always have massive control/anxiety problems. I’m not compatible with people who operate like that.

some men have no other choices if they want companionship though, sadly.

1st question: They are not interested in you.

2nd question: I get interest from women on apps who I have on interest in, who are often horribly incompatible with me. Why they are so interested in me, I will NEVER know. I ignore/block them. I have wasted so many years of my life dating people who were incompatible liars who only wanted to date me for shallow reason and I’m never making that mistake again. Responding to people is stupid if you are not interested in them.

What I expect is to go on dates with people who compatible with me and possible interested in me. What I mostly get is women who are completely disinterested in me if we are compatible, and lots of interest from incompatible women.

pretty much everything i do.

I’m an amateur at most things, don’t have the time/money/energy to become an expert in anything really. But I like trying new stuff all the time. I’ve learned 6 different foreign languages, but am fluent in none of them, for example.